Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
