Your face is a jimmy john
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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