Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I need a beard to bite.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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