Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
