So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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