Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize