The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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