If that was your dad, he is hot
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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