Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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