Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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