i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
