I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
