yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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