I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
