this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize