so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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