I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
