I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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