I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Damn victory sex feels great
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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