how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
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she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
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she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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