So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
