He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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