I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
