when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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