More tranny stories later!
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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