Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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