So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
