and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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