And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
