After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Blood and glitter go together right?
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
