the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
