A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
