shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Randomize
