I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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