Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
