Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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