You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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