He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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