i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
