he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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