Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
