My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
