She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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