He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
