I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
