Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
