break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
