Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
