Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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