hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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