Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
